I was at the park today. I just needed some fresh air and to get out of the house. Actually Grandma was getting real close to driving me insane. Plus it was actually above freezing today…
Anyway, I was watching a family playing in the snow. Mom, dad, and a kid who looked about 4 or 5 years old. The little one was laughing and having a great time in general. And the parents appeared to be having a blast too
There was a huge snowball fight. Making snow angels. Building a snowman. All those things that little kids love to do.
I was so freaking jealous. I can’t even explain it. My soul just ached. All I could think about was how I wanted a Mommy and a Daddy.
It hit me all at once how little my parents were with me. And when they were, a lot of it was about them and me making them look good. Dance recitals were about my family sitting in the front row making a good showing. Same thing for band and choir concerts. Award presentations were about how they could tell their friends what great parents they were, not about my accomplishments.
I feel bad for feeling the way I do. I know a number of people who lost their parents to death at very young ages. At least mine were alive and in my life. I feel like I have no right to complain. Things could have been a lot worse. So who am I to complain?